In Tynes We Trust

I spent most of yesterday with my muscles flexed until they became sore and knotted. My jaw was set and my teeth were clenched. I was living in mortal terror of the Green Bay Packers and the New England Patriots facing each other in Super Bowl XLII in Arizona. That would have been categorically awful. Worse then a Minnesota Wild-New Jersey Devils Stanley Cup final.

It would have been excruciating because the media is completely smitten with Brett Favre. Loves him. Eats him up with a spoon and then begs for more. Brett Favre can throw six interceptions in a game and the play-by-play man will laugh and say "That's just Brett being Brett! He's just having fun out there!"

Their love for Brett Favre is only surpassed by their adoration of the New England Patriots. Tom Brady, Bill Belichick and the rest of the Patriots are seen as being cold and calculating. Their every move so masterfully strategic that we mere mortals can't begin to conceive the import of even their most subtle of decisions. Tom Brady throws an incomplete pass? No, that's not because his opponent's secondary covered his receivers or because he was pressured by a confusing blitz package. Tom Brady was setting up the next play. He's tricking the defensive coordinator into pass-protection so that he can hand off the ball. It's all part of the Patriots carefully plotted plan.

Bill Belichick accidentally throws a challenge flag against the Colts? That's just a clever way of biding time instead of wasting a time out.

Eric Mangini calls the Patriots out on taping play signals? That's not cheating. That's sophisticated scouting that we shouldn't worry about. We should move on. It's in the past. Bill Belichick has moved on. Why haven't you?

It snows in Arizona in January? You don't even want to know what kind of dark occult rituals linebacker Junior Seau had to partake in to make that happen.

In short: the Super Bowl's hypemachine would have been in overdrive. Although I love the works of Peter King, Tony Kornheiser, Ron Jaworski and the lot, the collective orgasm of sports writers coast-to-coast over a Packers-Patriots championship would have been sickening. It would have prevented me from enjoying -- or even watching -- the Super Bowl.

I don't know anyone outside of Boston and the sportscasting brotherhood who likes the Patriots. I don't know anyone who wants them to win. I can't think of anyone who isn't tired of Brett Favre's inconsistent play being dismissed as boyish derring-do. The man is nearly 40, and has been a professional football player for close to two decades. He should not be making mental errors anymore.

What I do know is that when the New York Giant's Lawrence Tynes cleared the uprights in Lambeau Field and won the NFC championship in overtime, many of my friends were relieved.

Indeed, there but for the grace of Tynes, go I.

Although I am not a Giants fan, I am breathing a huge sigh of relief that they made the Super Bowl. It has cut down the overwhelming hype by at least half.

Bring on the inconsistent passes of Eli Manning (and not inconsistent in the oh-so-cutesy Favre way) and the rumbling drives of Brandon Jacobs. Let's showcase the heaven-sent foot of Larry Tynes.

I know who I am cheering for in this Super Bowl: balanced journalism over sensationalistic hype.

Weekend Wrap-Up: 2008-01-07

For sports fans everywhere, this was a great weekend. The IIHF World Junior Hockey Championship wrapped up with a Canadian gold for the fourth time in as many years. The National Football League's playoffs kicked off. The National Lacrosse League's regular season began. Perhaps most importantly, the ramifications of the Mitchell Report continued to be felt as Roger Clemens was besieged with mainstream press coverage demanding answers.

I'll touch on all these topics, but I need to talk about my road-trip to Pittsburgh, since it was so very sports-centric.



Pittsburgh is undoubtedly a sports town. In every window was a flag, a sticker, something supporting the Steelers, the UPitt Panthers, or the Penguins. Everywhere I went, someone had something to say about one of their teams, or about sports in general. People weren't just willing to talk about sports either. They were willing to listen as well. I had great conversations about the difference between the Pittsburgh market and the Toronto market, as well as different styles of play. I met one guy who loathed Vincent Lecavalier with a fiery passion. It was fantastic.

The thing that struck me most about Pittsburgh was just how different a market it was compared to my hometown Toronto. With the Steelers hosting the Jacksonville Jaguars for a play-off game, there was a strong football focus. But that focus wasn't just because of the playoffs. Pittsburgh loves its football, whether it be college or NFL. In my quest to catch the World Junior semi-finals, my friends and I went to six different bars, and only after we found the Prumanti Bros. in Southside could we find anywhere that carried the NHL Network.

This is what worries me. The good people of Pittsburgh love sports. It's a blue-collar town that will support any team bearing its colours. It's in the northern United States and there were hockey rinks everywhere. But no one had heard of the World Junior Hockey Championships. Worse yet, most bars were not carrying the NHL Network. This is a problem.

Most Canadians and true hockey fans talk about how lethal Gary Bettman's Sun Belt Expansion has been for the NHL. But for the NHL Network to be a non-entity in an ideal location like Pittsburgh? That means the NHL is in bigger trouble then we thought. After all, the Penguins have NHL poster boy Sidney Crosby and top picks Marc-Andre Fleury, Evengi Malkin and Jordan Staal. This should be the hottest NHL market in all the land. But it's not.

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.

Anyway, here are some of my point form thoughts from this weekend:

- Darcy Tucker and Jarkko Ruutu had a hell of a tilt on Thursday night at Mellon Arena. The crowd went absolutely wild for the fight, and IO have to admit I was pretty happy that the refs let the fight last as long as it did. I didn't see Tucker after the fight, but Ruutu is an absolute mess right now. It was maybe a draw, or maybe a win of Ruutu. I love Tucker, but I also think age is catching up with his hard style of play and I've got a sneaking suspicion he is playing hurt.


- Roger Clemens should re-consider his current claims of innocence in relation to the Mitchell Report. There's an awful lot of evidence piling up against him, and in this current baseball climate your word is no longer good enough. If you're clean, only the hardest of evidence is going to be enough to keep your name clear. Unfortunately, baseball fans have become so jaded and cynical that you're now guilty until proven innocent.

- Mark the time: The Toronto Maple Leafs are not going to make the playoffs.

- I love the Pittsburgh Steelers' style of play. Smash-mouth football with a focus on running and defense. I was sorry to see them get knocked out of the playoffs so quickly, since I thought they had a good shot at knocking off the dreaded New England Patriots. Wait a second. The Jacksonville Jaguars have a strong running game and solid defense.


- The National Lacrosse League kicked off its season this weekend with the Colorado Mammoth taking out the Calgary Roughnecks 10-9, and the Toronto Rock in Chicago taking out the Shamrox 11-9. It's a great relief to me to have the NLL back after the very real threat of a lost season. I'm also pleased to see my Toronto Rock winning their opening game, even if it is against the expansion Shamrox. You've got to start somewhere.